can you imagine what it's like to forget to laugh?
For a long time Stasia forgot what it was like to laugh. That’s because she felt completely alone in her role caring for her mum who has severe depression. While the pair have an amazing bond, 11-year-old Stasia has had to grow up quickly and it’s meant she’s sometimes felt different from others her age. “It’s hard for people at school to understand,” she says.
“I used to see other children giggling, but I didn’t and felt so lonely. I only have one close friend and she’d say, ‘I wish you’d cheer up.’”
When her mum was diagnosed with a blood clot in her leg and the doctor said she was lucky to be alive, Stasia was understandably worried. “I thought if my mum goes, I’ll be completely on my own. What will I do about the funeral arrangements?” she explains.
Given her concerns over her mum’s health, it’s little wonder Stasia’s found it hard to be carefree. “I want my mum to feel special and feel it’s my duty to cheer her up so I make her cards or take her shopping or for coffee and cake, which I like to pay for with my pocket money,” she says.
Stasia’s daily routine can be a huge challenge and she desperately needed to talk to someone who understood and could help her cope. Thankfully, she found friendship and acceptance at events held by Comic Relief-funded Spurgeons’ Young Carers Befriending Project, which offers fun, friendship and support to young carers in West Sussex.
“For the first time I found children like me and it felt like a big weight pulling me down had been lifted,” she explains.
Stasia was matched with Hannah, an adult volunteer, known as a befriender, who offers one-to-one support and accompanies Stasia on trips and activities. Hannah’s someone Stasia can talk to in confidence and they have a supportive friendship.
“I feel I can talk to people more now and I’m more confident and getting better grades at school,” she reveals.
“My advice to anyone else like me is to tell someone, it really makes a difference and you don’t feel so alone.”
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If any aspects of this story have impacted you and you need help and support please contact The Princes Royal Trust for Carers.
have you got a few hours a fortnight to spare?
We’re seeking to recruit volunteers over the age of 21 from across West Sussex to enable more isolated young carers to access activities and give them ‘time out’ from their caring role. If you’re interested, please contact register your interest today.